I'm done explaining. I just thought you all should know, in case you happen to take note that there are significantly fewer words tumbling from my overactive oral orifice (sounds dirty...but I like it) the next time we talk.
Okay, just this one last time, I'll explain.
I think it has to do with a pesky need for approval, and not really knowing what I want. I find that I'm always over-explaining things, trying to justify my decisions and actions in someone's mind, not least of all my own. And I tailor these explanations to the expectations I believe people to have. It's disturbing, distasteful and dumb. I will not do it anymore. I will do what I will do. I will think what I will think, and I will, for the most part, do and think without the running dialogue of whys and wherefores. It's nothing personal, you understand. It's not you, it's me.