Thursday, May 3, 2012

I buy Kleenex at Costco

I'm pretty emotional lately. I keep finding myself getting all choked up, generally in public, with very little prompting. It's bordering on embarrassing.

In Brooklyn I almost burst into tears at least half a dozen times just because I was so happy to be there - on the sidewalk, in the park, on the subway. I was one of the subway crazies.

Today, while at work, my client was talking about when her kids were young and how we make mistakes but there's some bad and good in every life and all we can do is hope that our kids remember mostly good things. I'm glad she couldn't see me frantically blinking my eyes like a nutjob.

And forget about Facebook. Man, it's like people are constantly one-upping each other in an endless crusade to elicit maximum emotional response. Dogs greeting returning soldiers, airport flash mobs, and this -

Letter from a Mother to a Daughter: "My dear girl, the day you see I’m getting old, I ask you to please be patient, but most of all, try to understand what I’m going through. If when we talk, I repeat the same thing a thousand times, don’t interrupt to say: “You said the same thing a minute ago”... Just listen, please. Try to remember the times when you were little and I would read the same story night after night until you would fall asleep. When I don’t want to take a bath, don’t be mad and don’t embarrass me. Remember when I had to run after you making excuses and trying to get you to take a shower when you were just a girl? When you see how ignorant I am when it comes to new technology, give me the time to learn and don’t look at me that way... remember, honey, I patiently taught you how to do many things like eating appropriately, getting dressed, combing your hair and dealing with life’s issues every day... the day you see I’m getting old, I ask you to please be patient, but most of all, try to understand what I’m going through. If I occasionaly lose track of what we’re talking about, give me the time to remember, and if I can’t, don’t be nervous, impatient or arrogant. Just know in your heart that the most important thing for me is to be with you. And when my old, tired legs don’t let me move as quickly as before, give me your hand the same way that I offered mine to you when you first walked. When those days come, don’t feel sad... just be with me, and understand me while I get to the end of my life with love. I’ll cherish and thank you for the gift of time and joy we shared. With a big smile and the huge love I’ve always had for you, I just want to say, I love you... my darling daughter. "

I can't say it enough. You really can't truly appreciate your parents until you are one. This letter makes me feel an urgency that I can't quite describe to let my mom and my daughter know just how thankful I am for them, and just how much they are loved. I wanted to give it to my mom as a Mother's Day card, but I can't wait that long. I love you, Mom. I want to be all of this for you, because you deserve it, because you were all of it for me.

Oh good, it's not just me. Must be a full moon or something.

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