This afternoon I learned that a friend of mine has cancer. She's young, just starting her career, in great shape...a super cool girl loving life. All I keep thinking is BULLSHIT!!! It just sucks, and I'm mad, and I'm sad, and I'm helpless, and I'm really aggravated at my ability to complain about the most ridiculously irrelevant things.
I don't care that E doesn't listen the first three times I ask her to go and sit on the potty. I don't care that J is always late and can't find his own clean t-shirts. I don't care that Ralph steps on my bare toes with his sharpened claws once a week and never apologizes. I don't care that my dishwasher is the crappiest dishwasher on the planet, or that the backyard is full of weeds or that nothing in my dining room matches.
I am healthy, my family is healthy, and I'm not staring cancer and surgery and chemotherapy and my own mortality in the face tonight, like Adrienne is.
There is absolutely no point in wondering why and why not and what are the chances and what if. It's not fair, it's not logical, it's certainly not meant to be. It's life, and it's yours until it's not anymore. So there.
E and I went to yoga this morning, and the teacher plays the best folky tunes in class and I resolved to listen to the song Peace Like a River by Elizabeth Mitchell whenever I need a little peace. I love folk music. Did you know that about me? Anyway, tonight I'm dedicating it to my good, brave friend, in hopes that it helps her find the place inside her own head and heart where she needs to be.
Having said that, given the choice I think she'd probably prefer rocking out to something like this,
and I can't really blame her.
Peace, Love, and Rock 'n' Roll.