Saturday, October 17, 2020

In case you need this today


This is for all of the parents out there doubting themselves today. For all of you who go into each day vowing to do your best, only to end the day picking apart your decisions. For everyone scrolling through everyone else's lives, knowing you shouldn't compare but comparing anyway and falling short.

We are doing okay.

Our kids may fight, we may yell, the TV may stay on indefinitely. 

We may have planned a healthy meal and then ordered takeout. 

The apples may be from the grocery store instead of the orchard.

We're still okay. They're still okay. 

It's okay.

I know I'm not saying anything new, but I'm saying it again right now for every mom and dad who knows it deep down but needs a reminder today. 

It's easy to look at our kids and see faults. Obstinance, messiness, laziness, "bad-itude". It's easy to get caught up in an endless cycle of frustration when NO ONE LISTENS OR COOPERATES OR ACTS RESPECTFULLY FOR LONGER THAN 5 MINUTES AT A TIME!!!

But this morning my 11 year old announced that she was going to look up some math questions to get a jump on what they would be learning next week. And as she walked out the door a few minutes ago, she asked her dad if she could take a science book for the drive and quizzed me on the earliest species of plants. 

My 3 year old gave me the longest, sweetest, most glorious hug this morning. For several minutes, we crouched on the kitchen floor, enjoying the warmth of each other's arms.

Both of my girls are such thoughtful, empathetic souls. They are kind to animals, friendly with strangers and always eager to help someone in need (unless that someone is mom and the need is tidying up). Whatever faults I can find in them are far outweighed by the truly valuable qualities they possess. 

My 3 year old showed me a cow sticker that she and her sister had placed on a kitchen cabinet yesterday. She spoke about the cow so lovingly. She pattered his head gently. She introduced me as though he was a great friend. 

Now I know it's just a sticker. But the pure goodness in a child's heart can be seen in a million ways, not the least of which is the ability to show love without prejudice, and reminds us struggling parents that no matter how many times we slip up, fall down, and generally fall short of our own expectations, we have created these divine beings who will learn things from us that we never even thought to teach, simply by witnessing our efforts to be the best parents we can be. And it will be more than enough.

She named him "Fuckface".


Welcome to the family, Mr. Face.


2 comments:

  1. Uhuh!

    Doing a great job Mel, keep up the great work...and maybe tone down the language a bit around the children, even when you think they aren't listening lol.

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  2. I feel like I have these days 3+ times a week! It’s always comforting to know I’m not the only one. I know it’s true we all experience these moments but the reminder helps! Thanks my friend! Miss you!!

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